a division of Sucker Punch Productions

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

American Driver: Drive-by kidney surgery

As someone who regularly drives and parks in a city, I have some dents and dings in the side of my car. I also have a fantastic mechanic that does great body work. What I don't have is the cash to throw at anything that doesn't compromise the way the car runs.

But at least seven times - and that is most likely a conservative estimate - a total stranger has leaned out their window, in a parking lot or at a stoplight, to shout: "Hey! You wanna fix that dent? I know someone."

What on earth makes anyone seriously think that I would say, "Why yes! I was completely unaware of how to care for my vehicle. You, perfect stranger outside the Shoppers Food Warehouse, are the answer to all my problems. Normally, I would want someone trustworthy, well-qualified and accountable to handle my property. But since you have vouched for him, random guy, I'll follow you right now and put everything in your friend's hands."

Whether I will use the following as future replies, or proactively track these people down where they drive and shop, is still undecided:

"Hey! My friend can take care of that limp for you."
"Hey! You know you got a little overbite? My friend can fix it right up."

"Hey - your mom looks like she's getting up there. She got kidney problems? 'Cause I got someone, can fix her. He can do it right here. Won't take that long. I'll call him right now. "

"Your back hurt? I know someone."
"Need blood pressure meds?"

Coda: A public survey
1) Has anyone ever actually used this as a method of car maintenance?
2) How much did they charge you? Was this a normal or back-alley rate?
3) Were you satisfied with the work, or did your muffler fall out two weeks later?

1 comment:

The Trendy Tailor said...

That totally happened to me--"hey, wanna fix that dent in your back panel? It's my day off but the shop's close!" as a driveby. How much do I wanna approach people to say "hey, your pants are dorkily short--want me to fix that?"